Letter never sent.

This is a letter I never had the courage to send. You'll understand why.

Dear. Meghan Currie;
I have been trying for so long to find something to describe how I feel for you.
I've tryed songs, storys, poems, words, pictures.
I've tryed writing countless things. Love rants, poems, you know them all.
I've tryed making up neat little metaphors, like you did. Thing is, I couldint think of anything significant enough to really say to you. Because to me, no matter how creative they are, they're never good enough.
I've tryed writing longwinded rants, which I post in blogs and whatnot. But Im always unsatisfyed with them. No matter how long they are, they are never long enough for me.
To be honest, I could go on for hours and hours, pages and pages talking about how I feel for you. About how goddamn perfect you are. But I would never take comfort in it, because I would always leave something out. I keep trying, believe me. But the fact is, Im always leaving something out. I cant pinpoint what the hell it is.
Maybe I'm not meant to know what it is. Maybe its just that little bit of completion that noone can completley understand.

I now know that no matter how hard I search, its always gonna be futile. I'm never, ever going to find something significant enough to represent my love for you, so all I can offer you is myself.
Because god only knows what I'd be without you.
I have tryed imagining life before you. And it was an unhappy place. My existence lacked meaning before you.
And now, I have meaning.
You.


So I'm giving up my search, because its like chasing a rainbow... It has no end. I am never , ever going to find something amazing enough to represent how much I love you. But believe me, if it existed, I would bombard you with it. Every single day.

I love you, Meghan.
And I never, ever want to stop holding you.

- Nathan Iles